How does a high responsibility Mom take care of 5 boys who have little interest in responsibility?
#1: She goes crazy. She spends her every step trying to command them in “duties”—wash your hands, take off your shoes, put away your toys, make your bed, brush your teeth, stay on task! Thus, she frequently finds said BOYS annoyed, dismayed, and wondering, “do we ever get to play?” or “Will she ever be happy?” She is going crazy because she is found constantly nagging and commanding, but happy? because the house is clean?!?
#2: She let’s it all go, which makes her go crazy. She allows the house to turn into a war zone. Toys everywhere, dirty clothes on top of toys, throw pillows remain on the floor, bed’s not made, books everywhere, shoes scattered, ALL DAY LONG. This makes HER agonized throughout the day and left wondering, “Will my house ever be clean?” or “Will they ever take responsibility for their things?” While the BOYS are HAPPY with their time of play, having fun together, making memories, and are without a nagging women in their ear.
Are these the only options? Is there a middle ground? High responsibility mom says #1 is our only option, #2 will “let them off the hook!” She demands, “I am to be in charge and they should do what I say!” She says, “Don’t they know by NOW that I expect them to be responsible?” She contends, “Let’s just throw everything away so we have less to be responsible for because I CAN’T DO IT ALL?!” She thinks, “Unless they do it when I SEE it needs to be done, they will never become responsible!”
Oh, but sweet Responsible Momma, dear sweet, Mother, let God’s Word speak to your heart. Solomon, a wise old man, once said, “There is a time for everything under the sun.” This includes doing responsible things and doing fun things. This includes picking up after ourselves and having a reason to have something to pick up. This includes hard work and play.
Solomon recognized that God had placed some high demands on his people, some pretty “hard work” and “high responsibility”. He goes on to say, “What do people really get for all their hard work? I have seen the burden God has placed on us all. Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can. And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God.”
Dear, stressed out, overwhelmed, frustrated, high responsibility momma, you are an amazing women! You understand the burden, weight, and importance of being responsible, hard-working, and committed to what “God has placed on us all.” Yet, my dear, maybe you need to be reminded that God has also given us much to enjoy and celebrate, and this WILL lead to messes. Dirty dishes, confetti, crumbs on the floor, gift wrap strewn and ripped, lots of chaos, but LOTS and LOTS of JOY and FUN, all to be cleaned up……after the party!
So, if you are willing to try, give #2 a whirl for tomorrow. Let it all go, but this time, don’t go crazy. Let those five boys have their “time for enjoyment and play.” Let them get dirty, make messes, play hard, laugh hard; let them “eat and drink and enjoy” and when the “party”, the day, is done, ask them to help with the “time for being responsible.” (for a later blog) You are a hard-working mom and they do love you! Now, go eat, drink, and enjoy!!
Father God, bless the heart of the high responsibility momma. Help her to know you see her hard work and you desire for her to enjoy the day. Guide her to see the right time for everything under the sun and to trust you with every season under heaven.